Sexy Sex — Episode Four of Bubble and Squeak

Last month I launched a new podcast, Bubble&Squeak. (You can hear it on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, TuneIn, Stitcher, PodBean, and Google Play.) The show is weird and wonderful, a delightful mix of storytelling, comedy, radio drama, and commentary.

Each episode is short, only 15 minutes, and in addition to hearing from me (as himself and playing multiple characters) I have also featured writer Elizabeth Rush and  now actor Danny Glover.

The latest episode is now available. It is entitled Sexy Sex.

Part one: Havana Cuba: Two Black Americans speak about race relations in the USA and in the Americas. You will hear actor Danny Glover and folklorist Dr. James Early talk about Standing Rock, prison populations, and anti-racism. “I don’t want to be an anti-racist; I want to be a protagonist.” Dr. Jame Early
Part two: A prank call to the future in which I call a sex advice expert. (see more below)
: a Sound slice from Sunbury, PA. In my study I type up my to-do list on a Royal desktop typewriter circa 1930.

In this episode I include a short radio play, a prank call to the future. I dial into a sex advice call-in line with the dilemma, “My boyfriend and I are not having enough sex.” No this is not because of internalized homophobia, rather they are temporary residents in an emergency shelter after a storm. Dr. Judith Housemeyer is adamant about finding a solution to the problem.

You can read the script below or better yet hear it in all its glory.

A prank call to the future: Dr. Judith Housemeyer Sexy Sex in a Time of Climate Change.
by Peterson Toscano for Bubble&Squeak

Dr. Judith: This is Dr. Judith Housemeyer. Yes, caller, this is Sexy Sex in a time of climate change. What is the problem here? Don’t be shy!

Peterson Toscano : Yes, Dr. Judith, I’m calling because, well, my boyfriend and I are just not having enough sex.

DJ. Oooo, the problem with the butt sex. We have heard of this. What exactly is wrong with this? Is he resistant? Are you uncomfortable with it? What is this? It is very normal!

PT No, no, no we love it. We love it,  It’s just that are in an emergency shelter right now because of a storm and there is no privacy

DJ:  I have heard, this is becoming a growing problem, yes for everyone, for the straights, for the bis, for the pans, everyone is having this problem.  Right, ok, well, have you been been able to perhaps try something, like go outside at night time.

PT Well, that’s hard because once it gets dark they lock the doors and that’s that. We can’t go in and out

DJ:  Yes, I have heard this. For security reasons. I understand. What about in the toilets? They have toilets there, ya, stalls? You could do a quickie there in the stall. Its not the first time, ya?

Photo by Honey Fangs on Unsplash

PT Well, yeah, but their disgusting. Oh my gosh they are so overcrowded and overflowing and its just…

DJ Oh, it’s a whole lot of backup of waste. I understand, ya ya, no no. Are there any other places that are private there?

PT Yes, there is one other place. There is attached to this is a pet, an emergency pet shelter

DJ Oh that is good, but there must be lots of people as well there taking care of the pets

PT Actually no, they’re really low on volunteers right now; they could use some help, so it’s pretty quiet

DJ Well if you don’t mind the animals watching, which is very normal for them just don’t get them involved, this is not Berlin in the 1930s hahahaha

Photo by Justin Chrn on Unsplash

PT No of course not, we could do that oh except my boyfriend he has some pet allergies.

DJ: mmmm, this does not have to be a bad problem, this could be fun, ya, ya,you get surgical masks, you could play doctor, uh, you could get the skimask, you can play muggings, this could be fun. Have fun with it! In this time of climate change we have to become creative and adapt, adapt to it and have fun.   Ok? thank you caller

This is Dr. Judith Housemeyer, with more Sexy Sex in a Time of Climate Change coming up. Call me with all your problems; I want to know I want to know.




(Featured Photo by Romi Yusardi on Unsplash)


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