My recent trips have taken me to Upstate NY, Philadelphia and now Denver.
Driving to the State University of NY at Oneonta, I stopped to snap this shot of a field with dry hay bales and new grass. The old and the new.
The juxtaposition of the two looks lovely here, blending harmonously. This is not always the case though.
After a recent performance of my “ex-gay” satire, a man approached me to talk about the show and his life. He reminded me of C.S. Lewis’ description of visitors to heaven in his short book “The Great Divorce”.
The visitors to heaven lack substance. Ghostlike, they tread carefully on the hard grass which literally pokes through their feet. Some are no more than smudges, others spirit-like beings that if they chose to stay in heaven will eventually fill in and become whole.
The man who approached me seemed to lack solid wholeness to me. He struggled to mantain eye contact and appeared shrouded in a cloak of shame.
I found out latter that he is a gay, Christian man, who still attends an ex-gay support group. He is in limbo, not Out and not In. A foot in both worlds, he belongs to neither.
Several people I know who attended ex-gay programs with me live in this state of being. I ache for them as I see them painfully conceal their true identities from the people they care about most. They live often hating themselves, feeling trapped, unable to cross over from one world to the next.
But should they cross-over, I believe they will find harmony, peace and joy. They will even mix old and new in a sane fashion and ultimately become a solid, fully formed, beautiful human.