In NYC for the day to meet up with some media types–nice folks all. I also got to see David C. Ah David C! I LOVE David C.
For one he first introduced me to Rufus Wainwright years ago when the Poses album first came out. In fact, it was also in his car that I first heard and fell hard for Bjork.
David C is also an ex-gay survivor. He graduated Love in Action (LIA) shortly before I arrived back in 1996. We have lived similar lives with David a few steps ahead of me.
Before LIA he also married a woman and then divorced. He knew the pain and disappointment of a good relationship that could not work.
He worked hard on his program at LIA and from what I learned took his life as a Christian more seriously than most people I ever met.
After some time out of LIA, living an ex-gay life, he too went through a crisis and began to question the teachings he spent so much time learning. He dove into an abyss of questions, questions of utmost importance. Questions about everything.
With tenacity and integrity he walked through that bitter valley unpacking everything he ever believed. He found music and poetry and art that spoke to his situation. He found models in St. George and Rosetti and Everything But the Girl. He explored faith and sexuality and truth and beauty.
I remember aching for David as he faced every issue head-on and then concluded that the ex-gay life he had pursued not only contained half-truths but was constructed on sinking sand. He mourned deeply. He faced his worse fears and ultimately built a new life.
He found a life partner then moved far from home. He returned to university after a 10 year gap and has used his magnificent brain with all of his might.
David has served as a model and mentor for me–not only in the new life he constructed, but more so in his fearless commitment to authenticity.
Thank you David for being such a true brother to me and for doing nothing half-assed.
There is *such* a need for true mentors in the LGBT community. I sense this particularly among trans people. I know I would be so blessed to have a mentor who has walked this path ahead of me. Perhaps I’ll have the blessing of being that mentor for someone else someday.
ally, I have no doubt that you already are such a mentor to people in your life. Some of the best mentors are oblivious of their powers.