Don't step on the basil!
Okay, so I come to the garden alone.
It’s early. Dew on the rose bushes and all.
Suddenly Jesus shows up. He like wants to walk with me and talk with me and stuff.
I tell him, “Dude, I have work to do. This lettuce is not going to plant itself.”
He then calls me a Big Ole Martha.
So I call him a Mary-loving Zombie has-been.
It was ugly. The neighbors got involved.
In the end I had to have a judge issue me a restraining order against Jesus. I mean he stepped on my radish seedlings.
Now he cannot come closer than 25 meters from me and the garden.
I try to work in the garden alone, in peace, but he is standing there, exactly 25 meters away, with this big sign, God Loves Fags!
He’s not getting any of my tomatoes this year. Just saying.
Who knew that the ‘Hound of Heaven’ had a produce fetish??
Thanks my friend.
Curt, you are welcome đ
The Jesus in that pic looks to be about the size of Tinkerbell. BTW, you know you always have extra tomatoes in season, maybe you should part with a few just in case there is a hell…
Andy walks with me. Andy talks with me. Andy is all over me. Tinkerbell Jesus. Only believe.
Jesus appeared to me this weekend on the face of a crushed egg. One minute you’re following the children around with a camera, and the next you’re explaining links between thorns, rabbits, and eggs.
Awkward!
THE MIGHTY GOD YHWH I AM THAT I AM YESHUA THEY THAT ARE WHOLE NEED NOT A PHYSICIAN BUT THEY THAT ARE SICK MATTHEW 9-12
Those who attempt to mock Christ will be left behind in eternal hell..Jesus loves the sinner but hates your sin…Get a clue or get left behind…
15 Minutes
Youâve lived a life doing whatever you wanted
As long as you were happy
Thatâs all that mattered
And
Friends came and went
But
You never remembered to prepare your heart
For
God
Even though you were continually told
That God sent his son
To
Die for the redemption
Of
Your sins
And
Yet you failed to let him in
Even time has its limits
What would you do?
If
You only had
15 minutes
By: VEL © 2010
To the lostâŠThe ones without Christ according
To
His
Holy
Word âŠthe ones who are in cult religions
Like Muslim
Mormonism…Jehovah witnessâŠand such
I pray for you to seek truth and follow Christ
Heâs coming soonâŠare you
R â„ A â„ P â„ T â„ U â„ R â„ E.. R â„ E â„ A â„ D â„ Y
Because my seat is in the upright position
And
I
Am
Ready
To
Fly ~
If you have not yet received Christ Jesus
As your personal Lord and Savior…
Please don’t put it off any longer simply bow your
Head and say this prayer with all sincerity…
Dear Heavenly Father…I know I am a sinner and that
You died for the redemption of my sins…I ask your forgiveness
Today and ask that you come into my heart and be my Lord
And savior. I know that you sacrificed your life on the cross…rose
On the third day and reign victoriously over all the earth…cleanse
Me from all unrighteousness and mold and change me that I might
Be more like you. In Jesus Holy Name…Amen