Category: Christian

A Positive Encounter with an Evangelical Christian

Y.E.C.A. Steering Committee members with three Y.E.C.A. Congolese Climate Leadership Fellows at a natural science training in Mwamba, Kenya. (from Left to Right, Andrew Kinzer, Diane Kyanga, Rachel Lamb, Faden Simbamtaki, Ben Lowe and Jolie Sifa Kpaka)

Y.E.C.A. Steering Committee members with three Y.E.C.A. Congolese Climate Leadership Fellows at a natural science training in Mwamba, Kenya. (from Left to Right, Andrew Kinzer, Diane Kyanga, Rachel Lamb, Faden Simbamtaki, Ben Lowe and Jolie Sifa Kpaka)

My Tangles with Evangelicals

Yes, I have had negative encounters with Evangelical Christians in the past. There was that whole period in my life when I struggled with being gay, and often well-meaning but misguided Evangelical Christians assisted in trying to destroy my gayness (and a bunch of my personality with it.)

Now I am in a new world of climate action. I know lots of people thinks Evangelicals + Global Warming = Denial in Jesus’ Name. Turns out there is a growing group of Evangelicals concerned about climate change.

Evangelicals Gone Climate Wild!

I recently spoke with Rachel Lamb from Young Evangelicals for Climate Action. As their name states, they are young Evangelicals speaking out to both their peers and faith leaders to act regarding climate change.

It was a fascinating conversation. In it we talked about development projects around the world and missionaries. Can these folks serve as eye-witnesses and trusted sources who will report back to their congregations in the USA about the dangers of climate change?

A Roman Catholic Eye-Witness from Nigeria

In addition, I spoke with a Catholic from Nigeria. David Michael Terungwa is a leader in the African GREEN Movement and Africa Regional Coordinator for Citizens’ Climate Lobby.

12814091_1079051085479495_8220017252282324008_n (1)

David Michael Terungwa (hand upraised) introducing low energy cooking stoves in a village.

He tells a moving story of how he has seen firsthand the effects of climate change. He also reveals how climate change affects women and girls in Nigeria and throughout much of Africa. They experience the effects of these rapid changes more than men in their communities.

If we want to see robust and meaningful action around climate change, than faith communities and leaders will need to be on-board. This is already happening. You can hear my interviews with Rachel and David Michael.

Missionaries as Climate Witnesses

Also, I imagine the role of Christian missionaries and their testimonies regarding global warming. In a radio report from the future, we discover just how instrumental these witnesses can be.

Check out this third episode of Citizens’ Climate Radio. We consider a variety of voices and have a monthly puzzler question. This is not a gloom and doom, fear and guilt podcast. Rather we offer hope and solutions, and I seek to do it with a professional, well edited audio magazine with great music. Enjoy!

Ex-Gay Lite: Celibacy–The Other Queer Lifestyle


Rev. Irene Monroe

Rev. Irene Monroe, recently posted an article, Celibacy Shouldn’t Be the New Ex-Gay Ministry. She writes about a growing trend among former ex-gay leaders, Christian ministers, and some gay Christians who believe God is calling same-gender loving people to a life of celibacy–no sex, no marriage–a single life with no prospect of future partnership.

She writes:

But now, with more and more ex-gay ministries losing potential clients and political leverage (while also losing monies reparative therapies generated), there is a gradual shift from “curing” one’s LGBTQ sexual orientation to abstinence from it. In other words, the theological message that homosexuality is a sin and an abomination to God remain intact, but more emphasis is now placed on celibacy.

An emphasis on a discipleship to celibacy is equally as harmful and damaging as ex-gay ministries.

This message suggests we’re incurable and should execute control over our ungodly desires.

Well said! After almost 20 years living as an ex-gay and then 10 years speaking out about the harm of changing and repressing a gay identity and desires, I have strong feelings about the Celibacy option for people who have romantic and sexual attractions for people of the same gender.  Part of me can see that it is actually very queer to be a celibate gay, to abstain not only from sex but from pursuing any potential partnership or romantic attachment. Queer as in odd or not the normal or mainstream. And as a community there is room for all sort of LGBTQ people. While there are some asexual people in the world, the reality is that most people feel sexual and romantic attraction as part of their humanity. Added to that, humans proposer in relationship. All sorts of studies reveal that people who are partnered are typically happier and healthier and even live longer.

Of course fate is not always fair. Not everyone gets to partner, so a single life is a reality for lots of people straight and gay. Being committed to celibacy chastity while single is standard for many straight Christians. But believing that God does NOT want you to have a partner, that God is asking you to to build a life without the prospect of romance or an interdependent relationship, that God forbids you from forming a coupled relationship which includes all sorts of wonderful things in addition to sex, well that is VERY very rare in the heterosexual world. Why is it suddenly looming so large for gays and lesbians? (I’m assuming bisexuals get counseled by Conservatives to partner with someone of the opposite gender. And I am sure the ex-gay movement–much like portions of the gay Christian movement–still has no idea how to approach trans* people and trans* issues.)

After years of having our sexuality demonized in churches, by family members, in society in general, and particularly in ex-gay programs, I find it highly suspicious when a lesbian or gay feels that God too is encouraging them to renounce their sexuality and their future with a partner. No doubt some people in the world genuinely feel called to celibacy (gay and straight,) but very few. And when someone feels that inclination, I strongly suggest they go through a thoughtful and serious discernment process with the aid of a professional therapist (and NOT a former ex-gay leader or someone who already has a bias against same-gender love.) Rev. Monroe beautifully explains:

Our bodies are our temples, and as our temples they house the most sacred and scariest truth about us: our sexuality.

Our sexuality is an essential part of being human and it is an expression of who we are with and in our bodies. It is a language and a means to communicate our spiritual need for intimate communion-human and divine. However, as lesbian, bisexual, transgender, and queer children of God, our sexualities transgress the conventional gender and sexual norms.

Also, our sexualities force us all to see the walls of partition erected in our society, in our churches, and in our families that prohibit us to live freely in our bodies. These walls not only contribute to the false socialization of who we are as male and female, but they also contribute to the false spiritualization of who we are as the body of Christ.


Caughnwaga Women by Marc Aurele de Foy Suzor Coté

There are plenty of heterosexual Christians–pastor, parents, friends, neighbors–who would love to affirm and embrace us just as we are, as long as we don’t flaunt it–act on it, live it. It is one thing to hold up a moral standard of monogamy and sex only within a committed relationship for straight and LGBTQ people alike, but to perform and celebrate heterosexual marriages while insisting that LGBTQ people must submit to celibacy is not only misguided, it is cruel. When I lived as an ex-gay and believed I could not successfully partner with a woman and was forbidden to partner with a man, I assumed I needed to live a life of single celibacy. But a strange thing happened, not only did I abstain from romance and sex, I felt it necessary to build and maintain thick walls around my life in order to protect me from potentially falling in love with friends. With no prospect for partnership or romance, I ended up going beyond a single life to an isolated one of deep solitude with no future and no hope of building a home and binding myself to someone to walk through life with me. It wasn’t the sex that I longed for, although I find physical intimacy with my husband today to be such a delicious joy, it was the whole package of mutual support, caring, affection, togetherness, sharing, and love expressed in thousands of ways.

Jesus, speaking about religious people of his day is recorded as saying, “Woe to you experts in religious law as well! You load people down with burdens difficult to bear, yet you yourselves refuse to touch the burdens with even one of your fingers!” (Luke 11:46) Then in Matthew 23 Jesus castigates religious leaders for making the life of a convert miserable: “…you make him twice as much a child of hell as yourselves!” The Conservative Christian church, former ex-gay leaders promoting celibacy, and loved ones of LGBTQ people need to repent of their heterosexual supremacy. They need to stop bearing false witness against their LGBTQ neighbors, and they need to recognize that heterosexual unions are in no way superior to our own. The world needs more love–not constrained, micromanaged, fear-driven teaching that only serves to harm people and impoverish the church. Rev. Monroe says it best,

Christians—both straight and LGBTQ—intolerant of the wide spectrum of sexual expressions must reconcile their fear with Jesus’s mandate: “…to love one another” as stated in John 13:34 in order to experience the deepest desire and expression of spiritual communion.  

    (Featured image: Flying Sphere by Robert Tait McKenzie Montreal Museum of Fine Arts)

My Pastor Didn’t Warn Me About This–Sin and Repentance on a New Planet

As a young adult, I attended the Times Square Church in New York City with the fire-and-brimstone-preaching minister, David Wilkerson. Brother Dave authored the famous book The Cross and the Switchblade made even more famous with its film staring Pat Boone as David Wilkerson, and a hunky underwear-clad Eric Estrada as gang member Nicky Cruz.

Brother Dave presented himself an Old Testament Prophet cross-bred with a Colonial Puritan pastor in modern garb and big thick 1980s-style glasses. Several times a week he stood at the pulpit to remind us that the USA was going to hell in a hand basket because of our iniquities–these included abortion, divorce, sex on TV, secular humanism, and of course homosexuality. As a result, an angry God was going to rain down vengeance on us in the form of economic distress, weather disasters, and naked dancing in the church (no joke.)


Time Square Church

Since 1973 Brother Dave issued his dire warnings often using fire imagery to get his point across. His last major prophecy in 2009 uttered shortly before he retired, moved back to Waco, TX, and then tragically swerved died in a head on collision with a tractor trailer truck, speaks of fires and violence in New York City.

An Earth-Shattering Calamity is About to happen. It is going to be so frighting. We are all going to Tremble, even the godliest among us.

For ten years I have been warning about a thousand fires coming to New York City. It will engulf the whole megaplex, including areas of New Jersey and Connecticut. Major cities all across America will experience riots and blazing fires such as we saw in Watts, Los Angeles, years ago in August, 1965. There will be riots and fires in cities worldwide. There will be looting — including Times Square, New York City. What we are experiencing now is not a recession, not even a depression. We are under God’s wrath

I sat under a steady diet of these types of messages including warnings of marauding gangs of homosexuals prowling the streets looking for young prey (which sounded more like what we did during our street evangelism outreaches and abortion clinic protests than anything I witnessed in any gayborhood.)

Yet with all these warnings of sins and consequences, I do not remember Brother Dave speaking out against our flamboyant, impure fossil-fuel lifestyle that has brought about dire consequences for God’s creation and all life on the planet. While he warned of increasing floods, tornados, hurricanes, and earthquakes, his prophecies never spoke of the natural consequence from overloading the atmosphere with greenhouse gases warming the planet leading to a disruption in ecological harmony. The sin was almost always sex, and the result was God’s wrath with lots of fire.

While he missed the details of how Earth-Shattering Calamity was about to happen, he no doubt felt something big coming. Pastor Dave highlighted an important principle of cause and effect, sin and consequence, indulgence and the resulting pain. Recently I wrote about Generational Curses, something Pastor Dave stressed often–how the sins of the parents will live on in their ancestors up to the seventh generation. What a fitting metaphor for exactly what has happened on the planet for the past 150 years as our ancestors stockpiled greenhouse gases in the atmosphere delivering a crushing blow on us their children and grandchildren. Like many addictions, the fossil-fuel addiction cycle continues, so that we add to the buildup started by our ancestors leading to genuine end-of-the-world scenarios.

Brother Dave ended each sermon with an altar call–Repent. Turn away from your filthy deeds. Start Anew. It is not yet too late. Again fitting words for the current crisis we have inherited. It is not yet too late to find solutions, to radically reduce our fossil fuel emissions, but as Pastor Dave often reminded us, individual repentance is not enough. We need revival–the nation and all nations turning to something new and leaving off the old.



Where to begin? Check out Citizens Climate Lobby to learn about a grassroots effort to lobby for a carbon fee and dividend, what I see as the most elegant and effective solution to curb our consumption of fossil fuels while providing a means to energize the economy and look after the energy needs of  working class and poor people.

Jesus Loves You! Void where prohibited by law

A few months ago I posted a series of Twitter/Facebook/Blog status updates that I compiled into a blog post entitled Jesus Loves You! But I’ve heard rumors… I figured that would be the end of it, but about two weeks later I got inspired again and began another round of Jesus Loves You! updates. Since the first round, John Henson, the brilliant Welsh minister and author of Good as New–A Radical Retelling of the Scriptures, has become a Facebook friend. (Do buy his book–it is stunning) He spiced up the daily updates with his own analysis on Jesus. Lots of lively commenting ensued from loads of different people including Deborah, Fredrick, Brett, Tania, Eddie, Susanne, Rabbi Nina, Jean–well loads of people. I also got tons of affirmation from Friends when I attended Quaker gatherings this summer. So many lurk in the Light. 😛

Like the first set this one brought out all sorts of Facebook friends who I rarely see. Some of the Jesus Loves You! updates really struck a chord, got people laughing, thinking, remembering, connecting. There is a move afoot to print some onto mug. Personally I think some would be perfect on a thong.

I purposely choose phrases that are ambiguous or have multiple meanings to let the readers decide what it all means for them. For me many of them serve as commentary to how Jesus is marketed by some churches–Jesus the product. There is also one Wizard of Oz reference there that confused a lot of people (which speaks to what an old gay guy I am that now people don’t get Oz references.) See if you can spot it. Some also speak to the challenges many of us have faced with the Christian faith as it has been taught and practiced and the double-standards we experienced. Some are just fun with no deep abiding meaning that I can extrapolate. I sometimes just like playing with words.

Check ’em out. Which is your favorite? What do they mean to you? Have some of your own you want to add?

Jesus Loves You!

  • Jesus Loves You! No purchase necessary to enter. Employees and families are not eligible. Void where prohibited by law.
  • Jesus Loves You! Side effects may include dizziness, exaggerated feelings of depression or elation, changes in sex drive & impotence.
  • Jesus Loves You! Yet you worry, that in spite of all you tell yourself (and all you’ve done) you still look fat in those jeans.
  • Jesus Loves You! Unconditionally. Well, kinda.
  • Jesus Loves You! He arrives at your door a battered beast seeking shelter, refuge.
  • Jesus Loves You! But he doesn’t like to brag about it.
  • Jesus Loves You! But he works weekends.
  • Jesus Loves You! But look out for the in-laws!
  • Jesus Loves You! Most scholars now agree that he looks nothing like his current Facebook profile photo.
  • Jesus Loves You! But he gets kinda weird when you start asking lots of questions.
  • Jesus Loves You! He loves you not. He loves you. He loves you not…
  • Jesus Loves You! With extra strength cleansing power! Those tough sin stains don’t stand a chance. Now in lavender or lemon-scented blood.
  • Jesus Loves You! Although he does live in an exclusive gated community & only let’s the ‘right’ people in.
  • Jesus Loves You! Christ Update 4.0 bulked up w/ new spiritual security enhancements & now compatible w/ Buddhist & Pagan operating systems.
  • Jesus Loves You! Behold the Lamb of God! (Yeah, he’s into that whole furry scene)
  • Jesus Loves You! Have seen this Savior? Last spotted in Roman-occupied Palestine circa 33 AD.
  • Jesus Loves You! You are truly lovely and extraordinarily worthy of love and then more love.
  • Jesus Loves You! Consider the lilies of the field before an ecological nightmare annihilates them!
  • Jesus Loves You! He ascended up to heaven & seated himself at his Father’s right hand, thus ending a 33 year custody battle.
  • Jesus Loves You! The exact whereabouts of the Savior is still unclear. Sources close to Jesus claim he mutated, became air-born & went viral.
  • Jesus Loves You! Why look ye for the living among the dead? He was forcibly removed from the planet 2000 yrs ago by his Father’s henchangels
  • Jesus Loves You! Pay no attention to that man behind the curtain.
  • Jesus Loves You! First Crusade Cola© then Inquisition Fruit Punch® and now Jesus Lite Energy Elixir™–fullness of life w/ 75% less wrath!
  • Jesus Loves You! “I am the Vine; you are the branches.” An invasive specie of global proportions.
  • Jesus Loves You! Purveyor of loaves & fishes since 33 AD. “Our cod is an awesome cod!”
  • Jesus Loves You! Do not fear the monster lurking under your bed or the one living in your heart.

Should I Attend my Child’s Gay Wedding???

Through Beyond Ex-Gay, Christine and I received a message from a parent wondering if he should attend his son’s wedding. In corresponding with this man, I felt moved by the humility and openness I sensed in his e-mails.

After considering conversations with friends whose parents did attend and those who did not attend their ceremonies, I wrote some thoughts down. Below is his original message followed by my response.

As a Roman Catholic, and the father of a Gay son, I am at a crossroad. As a devout member of my faith and Church, I don’t know if I should attend a ceremony if my son decides to marry one of the same sex. I love my step-son very much. That is why I used the word father instead of step-father. I have never had any problem with his choice of living, nor do I forbid him joining us at holidays and bringing his partner.

But the idea of marriage is something that my wife and I are debating quietly. Could you help me?

Here’s my answer:

Thank you so much for writing. Your message touches me deeply. In it I hear your love for your child. Mixed with love I hear the religous conflict that creates complications in regards to a possible marriage. That you seek out answers and communicate your thoughtfulness and concern reveals much about you.

I know of gay men and women who have fairly decent relationships with their parents, but because their parents chose to not attend their child’s wedding, the son or daughter felt deeply hurt and disappointed. They understood that their parents did not endorse the wedding. The son or daughter never wanted an endorsement. They wanted to share their special day, perhaps the most important day of their lives, with the people they love the most. In some cases, as a result of the parents opting out and the hurt and tension it produced, a wall of sorts has developed between parent and child.

When you go to your son’s wedding, it is a statement that you love him and that HE is more important than any issue in either of your lives.

Family members do not always approve or feel thrilled about the partners people choose. Awhile ago a female cousin of mine married a man that most of us could not stand. Loud, obnoxious, opinionated, he alienated lots of people with his big mouth. But my cousin loved him, and through the years we have seen how happy she has been and how wonderfully he treats her. I went to her wedding so many years ago because she is family. My love for her trumped any misgivings or discomfort I had.

You can be loving and loyal to your son without compromising your faith. This wedding will be his special day, and it sounds like he would want you there regardless of how you feel about two men marrying. Your relationship runs deeper than that, and from what I can see in the Gospels, Jesus cares about relationships, good loving relationships, above making a point. In fact, I think that was his point when he dined with folks that the religious leaders rejected. Besides the first miracle he performed was at a wedding (after his mother asked him).

I do hope you attend your son’s wedding even if it causes discomfort. I believe that in the end you will have far less regret if you go than if you do not attended.

A lot of people ask me about the Bible and what answers we can find in it about lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender people. Some people want to know: What does the Bible say about homosexuality? I think there is a richer question: Who in the Bible transgress and transcend gender? Who are the sexual and gender minorities in the Bible? I took a great deal of time to look into this and found some unexpected discoveries.

Official Trailer Transfigurations-Transgressing Gender in the Bible from Peterson Thomas Toscano on Vimeo.

Assorted Goodies

So much good stuff out there that has come to my inbox recently.

  • Candace Chellew-Hodge, the creator of, has a new book out, Bulletproof—A Spiritual Survival Guide for Gay & Lesbian Christians. You can hear a public reading here. Check out what Desmond Tutu has to say about the book.

    Gay and lesbian Christians are constantly demoralized and told they are not children of God. In Bulletproof Faith, Chellew-Hodge reassures gays and lesbians that God loves them just as they were created and teaches them how to stand strong, with compassion and gentleness, against those who condemn them. -Archbishop Emeritus Desmond Tutu

  • Allyson Robinson gets quoted in a great piece that appeared in yesterday’s Washington Post, Ruling Inspires New Hope for Transgender People.

    But for transgender women such as Robinson, the County Council’s passage of the law was a key reason she chose to live in Montgomery when she moved to the area this year from Texas to take a job at the Human Rights Campaign, a gay and transgender civil rights organization.

    Before settling on a townhouse in Gaithersburg, Robinson and her family sought to rent an apartment. She worried, unnecessarily as it turned out, that the landlord would want to pull out of the lease upon meeting her. Until the law took effect this week, Robinson said, the landlord could have rejected her application because she is a transgender person.

    In the past, Robinson has also worried about taking her four young children to public restrooms at restaurants, because she fears that someone will identify her as a transgender woman and call security. “You find yourself on guard, and mentally and emotionally prepared for that,” Robinson said. “You just never know. For many of us, this kind of thing we fear happens rarely; for others it happens constantly, and the fear of it is very real.”

  • Over the weekend I got to hang out with poet Karla Kelsey. She has done collaborative work with her partner visual artist Peter Yumi. You can see samples here.
  • If you go in for the whole debate thing, check out Opposing Views, which includes polar opinions on politics, religion, money, health and more.

Doin’ It Quaker Style

Doin’ it meaning worship that is. As many of you know I am a member of the Religious Society of Friends (aka Quakers). I came to the Quakers as a refugee after a religious odyssey that took me from Roman Catholicism to Fundamentalism to Evangelicalism to Pentecostalism to Anglicanism and ultimately (or penultimately?) to Quakerism. A long and winding road indeed. I do not regret any of the stops I made although some proved more useful than others.

For me the Quaker way provides something other than a belief structure. We don’t have any established creeds to which we ascribe or affirm. Each Quaker has his or her own beliefs, but we do hold onto values that we have grown to cherish through the years (peace, integrity, simplicity, etc). It has also proved to be a healthy environment for me as a person who is gay.

But if you want to see a Quaker sputter a bit, ask the Friend, “So what do Quakers believe?” It’s kind of like asking vegans, “So what kind of meat do you eat?” For me being Quaker is not so much about what I believe, but more about what I practice, especially the practice of silence and stillness in worship.

paul (lower case “p”)recently e-mailed me about his first foray into a Quaker meeting. I asked if I could share some of his initial experiences on my blog. He agreed, so I hand it over to Paul.

Four weeks ago I attended my first Quaker meeting. It was really something, kind of felt like coming home, it is very familiar somehow. We gay folk, or anyone who doesn’t fit the status quo really, are often outsiders, strangers. Some of us spend our whole lives hiding in order to fit in, which is a contradiction in terms, I know, but to get the feeling of acceptance we hide the part or parts of us we know won’t be accepted. When we find a place where we can simply be who we are, it’s profound, like an orphan coming home. I say “orphan” because many of us have never really had a home, so I guess this is what it feels like.

Quaker service is not like any church I have ever been to. Before service there is what is called “Bible Workbench.” I guess one might compare it to “Sunday school,” but it’s nothing like it really. Instead of a teacher, there is a moderator, and the “workbench” is an open discussion on a portion of bible scripture. All viewpoints are welcomed, the only ‘rule’ is you cannot disparage another’s comment… thought you are free to disagree.

After “Bible workbench” there is the Quaker worship service. This also is not like any “church” service I have ever been to. In every church I have been to, there is singing, often musicians, praying out loud and a sermon from a pastor or preacher. Generally lots of bells and whistles. In contrast, a Quaker service is an hour spent in silence. Any participant who believes they have a message to give, is free to give it, but my experience has been that there is more silence than messages. Bells and whistles are fine just like chocolate cake is fine, but a steady diet of it isn’t very healthy. I don’t think it can be a substitute for “stillness.” Especially if it’s true that we have to “be still” to “know” who “is God.” The bells and whistles can actually impede the event and distract us from “God” replacing God with a God substitute, an image of our own making (which seems like idolatry). “Stillness” seems the absence of all such ideas and images in and effort to encounter the Who is right now.

If you want to find a Quaker meeting near you, check out
To read other blogs by Quakers about Quakerism, check out

Lambeth, Quakers and Ex-Gays on the Radio

It’s my international radio weekend! Although I am in Western Maryland right now taking part in Quaker gathering, I will also be on the radio in Canada and beyond.

Tonight at 10:00 PM (Eastern Standard Time) I will be a once again be a guest on Vancouver’s Queer FM CiTR 101.9fm where I will talk about my recent trip to Lambeth, my upcoming trip to Vancouver, Canada in October and whatever else Heather, the show’s enthusiastic host, gets me to talk about. You can listen live here.

Also, last week while at Lambeth Conference, George Arny of BBC World Service interviewed me for the Reporting Religion program. I talk at length about my ex-gay experiences, Beyond Ex-Gay, my faith journey and being a Quaker today. You can listen to the program here.

Lambeth Log Day Two

Yesterday, my second at the Lambeth Conference, I felt mostly consumed with my own anxiety and excitement about my impending evening presentation (which went well–phew). I woke up early to work out some of the last details and to rehearse a bit. My hosts, the LGCM, played up the comedy part of my presentation referring to it as a cabaret. I think that serves as a good approach as Lambeth fatigue seems to have set in on many of those gathered here. I can’t believe they have been at this for two weeks. I am already exhausted after two days.

After my prep time and breakfast, I attended a Bible study organized by Integrity and Changing Attitude. We explored John chapter 9, an intriguing account outlining the healing of a man born blind. What struck me most was how Jesus only appears at the beginning and end of the long narrative. Much of the action has to do with the man (and his family) dealing with the religious leaders who simply will not listen to this man’s story.

24 So for the second time they called in the man who had been blind and told him, “God should get the glory for this,[b] because we know this man Jesus is a sinner.”

25 “I don’t know whether he is a sinner,” the man replied. “But I know this: I was blind, and now I can see!”

26 “But what did he do?” they asked. “How did he heal you?”

27 “Look!” the man exclaimed. “I told you once. Didn’t you listen? Why do you want to hear it again? Do you want to become his disciples, too?”

These clergy members eventually chuck the man out of the synagogue after taking issue with him and with Jesus’ authority. I see plenty of transgression here by both the man and Jesus–transgression against religious authority. Jesus broke the Sabbath rule as interpreted by these religious leaders when he healed on the holy day, and the man had the audacity to stand up to his religious leaders and not back down.

Each day the bishops and some other delegates meet for a daily Bible study/listening sessions in groups of about 40. One delegate (not a bishop) said that a woman in their circle takes notes of what happens. She turned to him after one of the sessions and said, “You are not a bishop.” He asked how she could tell. She replied, “Because you listen to other people.”

This is one group of many and the bishops in it represent a small part of the 666 bishops in attendance (what a Biblically ironic number of primates to gather for this event). But this incident reflects part of a chronic problem in many (most?) churches. The clergy do not listen. The hierarchy of many churches is such that most people don’t have a say in how the church operates.

I learned a little bit more about the Anglican worldwide community yesterday in speaking with a BBC journalist. One of the big problems is that the church leadership in each country technically stands alone with its own autonomy. Sure the Archbishop or a resolution at Lambeth can state You Must/Must Not Do XYZ, but no central authority exists to enforce the mandate. So you have diocese ordaining a gay bishop or women against the mandate handed down at previous meetings.

One corrective measure may be to create a more centralized body with the authority necessary to make the member churches comply with church teaching. The Roman Catholic Church wields this sort of control from Rome. It serves to keep renegades in order. It also limits the freedom of the people (and even God.)

The Quakers (in the unprogrammed tradition that I know) are not perfect. We have a decentralized system without clergy. We hold meeting for worship with attention to business where any member or attender can weigh in and must be heard. We seek to move forward with consensus among all the members who choose to be part of the process. It takes forever to make decisions and to work out controversies. But everyone has a voice in the process without a select group calling the shots for the others. That means that some Quaker meetings in the US will not perform marriages between people of the same-sex while others will. Each meeting needs to work this out for themselves.

I come to Lambeth for only a few days without access to most of the “important” meetings. But then most of the people in the Worldwide Anglican Community cannot attend or participate in most of the important meetings. The clergy can run the risk of living apart from the people, talking theory without practicing pastoral care.

End of Sermon 🙂

I spent much of the day yesterday relaxing with Auntie Doris, Tractor Girl (from the Ship of Fools), and William Crawley. The best moment was a nap on the law of Canterbury Cathedral while the other three went inside.

As I said above, I felt my presentation went well. I had lots of competition for audience with at least three other LGBT-affirming events going on simultaneously, but we still had a good crowd and I believe I made the right choices. I appreciated the time of silent worship before the presentation. One member of the local Quaker meeting joined us for that.

Today I have an interview with BBC Worldwide Service’s Reporting Religion program (which will air over the weekend) and then I do my presentation again tonight. Off to London tomorrow then home on Saturday (for a day before I head off to Baltimore Yearly Meeting).

Blogging from Lambeth

Thanks to the expert driving skill of Auntie Doris I arrived safely at Lambeth Conference in Canterbury. Fortunately (or not) I have wi-fi in my dorm room on campus here at the University of Kent so I can blog some.

On the way to Canterbury we listened to LBC Radio (a talk radio station for the greater London area) and the show hosted Jeni Barnett. She offer topic after topic in a frenetic random order, but the one issue that caught my ear had to do with English people trying to change their accents to sound more like the Queen. She asked for callers who had also tried to change their accents.

I turned to Auntie, “Should I?” and with little more than a nod from her, I called. (Joe Gee, that fabulous podcaster, will be simultaneously proud of me and appalled by me). I explained that in the US I get much better customer service when I speak with a posh British accent. This accent is a perceived by many in the US to carry class and sophistication (and it may possibly be a bow to our former colonial masters :-p ). In fact, when I was quite young, I tried to emulate some of the British accents from films in order to alter what I considered my “gay accent.” I thought I might get people off the gay scent.

I then talked about the Ex-Gay Movement and how much of it has to do with gender including getting one’s voice to adhere to gender norms. Some ex-gay leaders taught me that proper men speak with a downward inflection and use less words than women. They also instructed me to drop to my lower register when I spoke. I wrapped up the brief radio segment by letting Jeni know that I was off to Lambeth (pointing towards Canterbury as I spoke on the phone in the car) to do a talk/performance/cabaret act about my time as an ex-gay and the process to integrate my sexuality and spirituality.

Joe Gee will no doubt call me a media whore. I often remind him that I am simply a press magnet. Auntie Doris wants to have a goal that every time I travel with her by car in England, I need to find a reason to call into one of these programs.

After this encounter with Jeni, Auntie and I arrived at Lambeth. I had been invited by the Lesbian and Gay Christian Movement (LGCM). Richard Kirker of LGCM met me, sorted out my room at Darwin Hall and then pointed me towards the exhibitors hall.

Auntie Doris and I walked into the hall then froze with our mouths wide open. No, it was not a display of fine dark chocolates from around the world. What greeted us proved to be much richer and appealing. The most gorgeous, colorful, artful robes and stoles captured our attention. They hung draped on racks and hangers calling to us to wrap ourselves up in ecclesiastical prêt-à-porter. As a Quaker, I suddenly felt envy for these Anglicans and their brilliant plumage. As a gay man with a penchant for auspicious and flamboyant clothing, I felt right at home.

We walked around the stalls, and just like Auntie Doris’ uncle (an Anglican vicar) told us, several exhibitors expressed a strong pro-LGBT message. In fact, I counted at least four stalls set up with colorful posters and lots of literature all about the full inclusion of lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender people.

The Zacchaeus Fellowship, a Canadian Anglican ex-gay type group, had a small stall set up with some literature, but they had no staff present when we passed by. They provided booklets with stories of four ex-gays and a hand-out with suggested books and links for “those struggling with homosexuality.” These included books by Andrew Comiskey, Joe Dallas, Leanne Payne, Mario Bergner and Joseph Nicolosi (A Parent’s Guide to Presenting Homosexuality). In their list of “Websites of Interest” they mention several groups including PFOX and NARTH, and Ex0dus Global Alliance. At the bottom of their list of resources they provide this disclaimer:

Please note: The above information is provided as a courtesy. The reader must determine the suitability of the contents found under these links for his or her purposes, interests and beliefs.

Speaking with two women at the Integrity/Changing Attitude stall we agreed that ex-gay promoters and providers would also offer warnings similar to those found on cigarette boxes here in the UK.

WARNING: Immersion in ex-gay theories and practices may harm you and those around you.

In offering ex-gay treatment (in whatever form they suggest) as an option, I do not often hear the fact that most people come to the conclusion that they do not need alter their orientation or submerge it or cut it out of themselves. In fact, in trying to do so many of us have actually experienced harm. Sure a handful of people say that such a change is possible and that they are happy no longer identifying as gay or lesbian, but from my experience of 25 years in and around around the ex-gay world, these folks represent a tiny majority of the many people who attempted it before them.

The good news is that I heard mostly positive messages today about LGBT people, especially in with the screening of a new film, Voice of Witness: Africa. Filmmakers Cynthia Black and Katie Sherrod traveled from the US to Africa to film LGBT people in Uganda, Kenya and Nigeria. They state:

It is an awesome responsibility, for just by talking to us these folks are risking more than any of us privileged people can begin to understand.

Among those we talked to is
* a transgendered [F to M] Nigerian
* a partnered lesbian activist in Uganda
* a transgendered [M to F] Ugandan
* one of a pair of gay 20-something twins in Kenya
* a gay Ugandan farmer whose dream is to own two acres of land to grow his sugarcane
* gay partners in Kenya who dream of having their union blessed
* a gay Nigerian who was beaten badly simply for being gay

I felt especially moved by the stories of the trans people in this 20 minute film. Apparently traans people face even more risks and dangers than lesbian, gay and bisexual people. All the stories moved me especially when they spoke of their faith. Then seeing the retired Ugandan bishop, Christopher Ssenyonjo, speak passionately about LGBT issues and even starting a Bible study for gay men floored me.

Afterwards I got to meet many LGBT and affirming people in the Anglican/Episcopal Church including:

At dinner I ran into William Crawley, who I first met in Belfast in May. He will do his BBC Radio Ulster Sunday Sequence from Lambeth this week. Do check it out. (No Joe Gee, I will not be on it).

I also got to meet Christina Rees, chair of Women and the Church (WATCH) I’ll put a link but their site was down tonight. We had a great chat about gender and sexism in the Church and about how so much of the gay issue comes down to gender and an anti-fem attitude. (which goes back to the point above about how I changed my voice to sound more “masculine” as part of my de-gayification process). After Christina mentioned to me that about 70% of the Anglican Church attenders/members are women, I suggested she change her organization’s name to Women and Their Church.

So I guess this is the part of the blog entry when I share my first impressions and my current feelings. I feel happy to be here, honored in many ways. It also feels less of a big deal than I had imagined. I mean reading the press reports for the past few months, seeing the photos and such, I came with this big notion of LAMBETH. Having arrived, now I see people. Sure some dress in exquisite tailored frocks, but under their finery, I see people. People can connect. They can listen to each other. They can affect each other emotionally, intellectually and spiritually. The concept of LAMBETH intimated me. But people? I like people.

(Wed and Thur at 8:00 PM I will present here at Lambeth–The 70% Show, a talk/performance/whatever about my own spiritual journey as a Christian who happens to be gay and my nearly 20 years as an ex-gay. For more info see: LGCM site)